My Dear Henrietta,
My Dear Edwin,
I am very much obliged by your nice little birthday gift -- it was much better than a cane would have been -- I have got it on my watch-chain, but the Dean has not yet remarked it.
My one pupil has begun his work with me, and I will give you a description how the lecture is conducted. It is the most important point, you know, that the tutor should be dignified and at a distance from the pupil, and that the pupil should be as much as possible degraded.
Otherwise, you know, they are not humble enough.
So I sit at the further end of the room ; outside the door (which is shut) sits the scout : outside the outer door (also shut) sits the sub-scout : half-way downstairs sits the sub-sub-scout ; and down in the yard sits the pupil.
The questions are shouted from one to the other, and the answers come back in the same way -- it is rather confusing till you are well used to it. The lecture goes on something like this :
Tutor. What is twice three ?
Scout. What's a rice tree ?
Sub-Scout. When is ice free ?
Sub-sub-Scout. What's a nice fee?
Pupil (timidly). Half a guinea !
Sub-sub-Scout. Can't forge any !
Sub-Scout. Ho for Jinny !
Scout. Don't be a ninny !
Tutor (looks offended, but tries another question). Divide a hundred by twelve !
Scout. Provide wonderful bells !
Sub-Scout. Go ride under it yourself !
Sub-sub-Scout. Deride the dunder-headed elf !
Pupil (surprised). Who do you mean?
Sub-sub-Scout. Doings between !
Sub-Scout. Blue is the screen !
Scout. Soup-tureen !
And so the lecture proceeds.
Such is Life.
from
Your most affect. brother,
CHARLES L. DODGSON
